The Power of Playing Make Believe Exercise Part I.

Yesterday I received a letter from a friend who is like a lil sister to me.  She was writing about being stuck in her current environment.  She said something like, "I don't want to be in the same place as I was last year."  Often times when we feel immobile we look for others to give us words of encouragement to help us counter our inner fears.  Sometimes this works out and other times it feels like a complete DISASTER depending on the responses you receive from your friends.  Advice: (Keep positive folks around and ditch the negative unless their family)  Sorry.

Since all answers lie within, I told her about a simple but powerful exercise that was going to give her more confidence to face her fears.  I've been doing this particular exercise since age two.  LOL  The real is kids always do it but then right about the age of 13-14 it goes bye-bye.  I'm talking about the ability to play MAKE BELIEVE.  Now before I get into the exercise, let me tell you why this is MORE IMPORTANT that writing down a business plan or a list of goals that you want to achieve in life.  I'm assuming most of us want to be successful.  I doubt that we want to stay put and feel stuck.  And I would venture to say that a good majority of us have also written down goals as a means to outline our potential dreams.  Here's the problem with just writing it down.  If you don't believe that you can obtain that goal...IT AIN'T HAPPENING.  I know folks will say well if I think about it, it will come about and blah...blah...blah.  That's not how the creative process works.

First we must see our goals clearly (writing them down does help), then we must believe in them, and then and only then do they begin to take form and start to manifest.  Of course that's the super, simplified version.  What my lil sis was asking about was gaining more belief in herself in order to silence the outsiders, ie. her family.  After all faith is the only cure for fear.  The millionaire dollar question then is: How do you gain more faith?

Well most folks will tell you that if you're not born with it then you're SOL.  I don't think that's the case.  But just like with everything in life, it takes mental discipline and much practice.  In a nutshell, here is the exercise I gave her.  I used this exercise diligently to purchase my first condo without realizing it and used it for my second condo and most recently I used it to start acting with no prior experience.  Folks always ask me how is that I'm able to jump from industry to industry.  Up until now, I was hesitant to tell people for fear of ridicule (adults pretending and playing=crazy in this society).  But here is the truth.  I first see it in mind, then I play make believe, and then I take action.  VOILA!

MAKE BELIEVE: Part I.  (The Senses) 

Why is this effective?  This is for the skeptics out there who always need to know why this and why that...lol I'm one of those people.  The brain does not know the difference b/w what is real and what is pretend.  When you don't know HOW to do something, you have no choice but to pretend it.  Over time, the brain will begin to accept the make believe as REALITY.  This is why pro athletes run the race first in their mind or execute plays while day dreaming.

 The Exercise:

 Part of what makes imagining something feel real is creating the environment of the goal you desire.  The more real it becomes, the more you begin to BELIEVE that you are able to execute what you are imagining.  Pick a quiet space alone and begin, for me this means bubble bath time.

• The first step is to pick a goal.  Let's not get fancy and write 10 goals all at once, especially if you don't use your imagination on a regular basis.  If you are a "realistic type" then start with one goal.  For example:  My goal was simply to start acting on stage. 
• The second step is to create the scene in your mind.  Close your eyes and try to visualize the environment.  What does the place look like?  What does it sound like?  Who is there with you?  What do you have on while you are attempting your goal?  For example:  If your goal is to holler at a girl that doesn't know you are alive; what would you be wearing when you meet her?  The idea is to have FUUUUUUUUUUUUUN with this people.  If you start saying, "Man I would like to have on a Rolex Watch but I can't afford that", you are going in the wrong direction.  For GOODNESS SAKE you are dreaming damn it!  DREAM BIG. 
• Ahem...sorry I get worked up about this stuff.  I can't tell you how many times folks defeat themselves while day-dreaming which translates into perpetuating a lack of confidence in their reality.  This brings me to step three.  PLEASE leave your fears at the door.  You are pretending.  However, pay attention to what that little inner voice is telling you.  If it's constantly worrying you to death about money or women or your family's concerns; it is a major indicator that your predominant thoughts encompass worry.  Worry brings about more fear and fear based people in the forms of friends/co-workers who are going to push against your dreams.
• The fourth step is let go and place your self in medias res.  In Latin that means, "into the middle of affairs".  Your only requirement is to create an IDEAL circumstance.  This means actually acting out, or visualizing the scene as it plays.  This is where that little inner hater voice usually gets his/her way.  For example:  If you are trying to become an actress, you don't want to dream up a situation where you start choking on stage or falling while exiting.  However, this is what we do.  We've been programmed to create less than ideal circumstances for what we really want.  And what happens?  Our brains later tell us that it's too scary or too dangerous.  It becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.  Focus on PERFECTION when you play make believe.  If you don't know how to do it, watch kids.  Later on this year, I'm thinking about having a workshop.  I had no idea that adults had lost their ability to play until recently.   Another issue pops up when we are pretending.  We don't like looking silly in front of others.  That's fine, I suggest finding a place where you can pretend alone.  But know this...YOU should begin to believe in what you are doing as you practice over and over again.
• The fifth step is HAVE FUN!  This should feel amazing and fun like you're role playing a totally different person.  You might think, this is silly at first.  I'm never going to gain the courage to talk to that girl I really like.  But the more you rehearse it in your bedroom where no one is looking, the more confident you'll appear when it's no longer a dress rehearsal.  By the time I hit the audition for the first time, I had already done 40 scenes in my mind while soaking in the tub.  As a result I got the opportunity to play the lead.  Be bold and brave with your dreams.  Please do not limit yourself!

P.S. Let me know how playing make believe goes for you!  Good Luck!
Shak
100.

The Catch 22 of Being Creative

It’s the blessing and the curse.


Creative people see opportunities and ideas everywhere. I was listening to Lil Wayne’s song w/ Eminem, "Drop the World" while I was driving back from my morning run. And out of nowhere, this warrior style Anime chick popped out of my head. I don’t know where she was going, but she had a black cape with a laced veil and was walking in slow motion blowing up the streets around her while it was raining softly. A blade came at her face, maybe it was ninja star, and it sliced one of her high cheek bones wide open. The blood splattered everywhere but she just kept walking. She wiped her cheek, took out a toothpick or was it a match and placed it in the corner of her mouth. Her cape flew open and revealed dynamite sticks. She lit one, and threw it grenade style towards the direction of where the blade had come. Then gracefully, she strutted down the middle of the street and kept walking. WHAT THE HELL? Sleep deprivation + Lil Wayne = Deadly daydreams while driving. MAN!

I’m supposed to be designing inspirational cards right now. I don’t even read COMIC BOOKS. What the hell is wrong with my mind? A woman blowing up the streets isn’t going to inspire young women. ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH! And so this is the problem with my mind. It focuses on what it wants to imagine, I’m just a passenger going along for the ride. Maybe it was the run, too much adrenaline pumping in my veins. But this type of craziness had just got to stop. I mean I’ll never finish a lovely, Disney-esque project at this rate. WHAT TO DO?

At the moment, I can’t start writing about some vigilante style anime chick. I got other projects to finish. She’ll have to wait her freakin turn. Who does this chick think she is anyways?

Man but if you would have seen her heels!  They might have been Charles David not sure though.

Shak
100.

EXCUSES!

Excuses...everyone has one.



Excuses are monuments of nothing that build bridges to nowhere. Those who use these tools of incompetence are masters of nothing.


I’m no longer going to say, “I don’t have time to write because of my day job.” I’m going to create every day even if it’s for 15-30 minutes. I’m going to keep a note pad by my side and just get to writing. I’m also going to buy a freakin recorder because sometimes the dialogue comes so fast I CAN’T write it out in time.


As for the actual creation of products such as my greeting cards, short films and books; I’m going to set aside 30-60 min every other night right after soaking in the tub to CREATE. I get most of my inspiration and ideas in the tub or while driving. That way I can start small and build a dependable system. On the weekends, I’ll dedicate one day for 1-3 hours to create. 

Hmmm...I already feel better.

Shak
100.

"Who Do You Tell Your Stories To?"

Who do you tell your fears?  Your wishes?  The embarrassing crap that you'd soon forget buuuuut someone has to know.  lol  Who do you tell your daydreams?  One of my favorite things in the world is to daydream, seriously.  I trust my daydreams in the hearts of my friends.  A lot of mine are about success like when Oprah interviews us or when a magazine writes an article about us, photoshoots....  Sitting in the director's chair, MY director's chair on MY set.  Smiling and working with the crew and talent.  Of people not thinking that I'm a Director because of my stature and being even more surprised when they realize I'm a beast.  lol (sidebar: I'm so sincere about all of the above. ;) )  

I think daydreaming totally gets a bad rap.  Growing up, adults always make it seem or even say that daydreamers are listless, lazy, unfocused blah blah blah.  I love to daydream and over the past few years have allowed myself to do it more often.  Everyday in fact.  I find my vision has gotten stronger and I know more about myself.  Daydreaming isn't for suckers it's for... da-da-dada-dah... dreamers.  It's for people who change the world and invent stuff.  People who see life differently and want to make it different.  The fact is that daydreaming is actually the breeding ground for innovation, growth and success.  How else do people who are doing their "in the meantime/keep the bills paid" jobs keep sane while they go after their passion in their off time?  The cool thing about it is that when I share my daydreams I get to see them more clearly.  It's easier to put something into action when you can see what IT really is.  Sharing my stories with others helps to fuel my vision and feed my passion.  Through the practice I am able to articulate what I see in my mind's eye more effectively.  I dream amazingly big and I feel bad for people who think that it's too much because somewhere someone told them that daydreaming was for losers and they believed it.

100.

Bright

Victory over Trials

I found this excerpt below in my email this morning: Come get that inspiration!

The need to weather hard times is constantly part of our business and personal lives. Do you ever think of these hurdles in a positive light? The next time you are faced with opposition, instead of looking at it as a source of anxiety, view it as an opportunity! Can you apply what you have learned to other areas of your life? Will this experience make you stronger and wiser next time around? Sometimes the worst and most painful experiences are the ones that help us grow the most. Having a positive attitude can deflate even the scariest situation. Overcoming adversity can help you achieve the extraordinary!
 

This brings to mind my senior thesis for high school. We all had to type this paper in order to graduate that was at least 25 pages in length. But it wasn't typing a long paper that was the major victory in the end, it was the process of finding a computer to actually type the damn thing. I must have used about 5 different computers and typewriters (friends/library) in order to put the paper together. Can you imagine using a freakin' typewriter from the library? First I had to humble myself to ask to use other people's computers because I didn't have one. Second I had to coordinate crazy schedules in order to fit the timing of when they weren't using their own computer. Even though I got like a B-/C+ on the paper itself; I knew deep down that no one had gone to greater lengths to actually finish the paper. This is the thing about schools they only grade the finish product which is a BIG mistake. What about the process it takes to complete a project/paper?  We become who we are based on the grind, the actual work we put into the finished product.

That was the formative years 7th-12th grade that molded me into a certified grinder. I didn't have much of the same resources as some of my peers, but I knew there was always a way. I ended up typing 25 pages straight at my homies house, started at 6pm and finished at 6am...dropped the paper off in my P.J.s. I think some of my teachers always thought that I wasn't giving enough or that I half-assed things and didn't use my full potential. Perhaps they were right in some cases. But sometimes we can't see behind the scenes. I had to get it done whenever, however I could...which is something that comes from having your back against the wall. You either figure out a way or you fold.

The problem in life is Comfort is a luxury most of us CAN'T afford. Most of us never see opportunities because we're waiting for the perfect package that seems easy, something we can readily handle in our present situation. Opportunities are usually laced with difficulties, the unexpected and require us to grow and to stretch. I didn't get an A on the paper, but I learned that I only need the will and the desire to act on that will to make it happen, and the rest will take care of itself. If I would have waited for my own computer, I would have been waiting until I was a senior at USC, when I bought my own. I made through highschool and all through College using probably around 50 computers in total to complete all my assignments. And while I'm not a master by no means on the computer, I do consider myself masterful at gettin' ish done by all means possible.

P.S. For one week, try cooking without a microwave, or try catching the bus/catching rides with friends, or set a small weekly allowance for a week and stick to it, if you blow it all in one day living the life...improvise. Creativity and Flexibility are usually born out of trials and limitations. Who knows what you might create along the way.

Shak

100.